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Twain, Mark, 1835-1910

"Sketches New and Old"

FOR SALE CHEAP.
FOR SALE CHEAP. FOR SALE CHEAP.
At first it seemed to the professor that this was a sign-language, and
that each word was represented by a distinct sign; further examination
convinced him that it was a written language, and that every letter of
its alphabet was represented by a character of its own; and finally he
decided that it was a language which conveyed itself partly by letters,
and partly by signs or hieroglyphics. This conclusion was forced upon
him by the discovery of several specimens of the following nature:
He observed that certain inscriptions were met with in greater frequency
than others. Such as "FOR SALE CHEAP"; "BILLIARDS"; "S. T.--1860--X";
"KENO"; "ALE ON DRAUGHT." Naturally, then, these must be religious
maxims. But this idea was cast aside by and by, as the mystery of the
strange alphabet began to clear itself. In time, the professor was
enabled to translate several of the inscriptions with considerable
plausibility, though not to the perfect satisfaction of all the scholars.
Still, he made constant and encouraging progress.
Finally a cavern was discovered with these inscriptions upon it:
WATERSIDE MUSEUM.


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