Digital heart book

From this picture of my own disgrace and wretchedness
it is not wonderful if my mind turned with relief to
the thought of Pinkerton waiting for me, as I knew,
with unwearied affection, and regarding me with a
respect that I had never deserved, and might therefore
fairly hope that I should never forfeit. The
inequality of our relation struck me rudely. I must
have been stupid, indeed, if I could have considered
the history of that friendship without shame--I who had
given so little, who had accepted and profited by so
much. I had the whole day before me in London, and I
determined, at least in words, to set the balance
somewhat straighter. Seated in the corner of a public
place, and calling for sheet after sheet of paper, I
poured forth the expression of my gratitude, my
penitence for the past, my resolutions for the future.
Till now, I told him, my course had been mere
selfishness. I had been selfish to my father and to my
friend, taking their help and denying them (which was
all they asked) the poor gratification of my company
and countenance.


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