It
would be a blow at the democracy of dogs. It would reduce the whole of
dogdom to a pampered class of degenerates. Is there anything more odious
than the spectacle of a fat woman in furs nursing a lap dog in furs, too?
It is as degrading to the noble family of dogs as a footman in gold buttons
and gold braid is to the human family. But it is just these degenerates
whom a high tax would protect. Honest fellows like Quilp here (more
triumphant tail flourishes), dogs that love you like a brother, that will
run for you, carry for you, bark for you, whose candour is so transparent
and whose faithfulness has been the theme of countless poets--dogs like
these would be taxed out of existence.
Now cats, I continued--(at the thrilling word Quilp became tense with
excitement), cats are another affair. Personally I don't care two pence if
Mr. McKenna taxes them a guinea a whisker. There is only one moment in the
life of a cat that is tolerable, and that is when it is not a cat but a
kitten. Who was the Frenchman who said that women ought to be born at
seventeen and die at thirty? Cats ought to die when they cease to be
kittens and become cats.
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