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Stewart, Donald Ogden, 1894-1980

"Perfect Behavior; a guide for ladies and gentlemen in all social crises"

It is for the
manufacturers, the professional class, the capitalists to give up
gladly whatever small pleasure they may have derived from the use
of alcohol, in order that John Jones, workingman, may have money
in the bank and a happy home, instead of his Saturday night
debauch. In every democracy the few sacrifice for the many--"the
greatest good of the greatest number" is the slogan. And I, for
one, am proud to have been a member of that legislative body
which passed so truly God-bidden and democratic an act as the
Eighteenth Amendment.
I beg to remain, with best wishes to your great
organization,
Sincerely yours,
WALTER G. TOWNSLEY.

A Correct Private Letter of a Congressman
DEAR BOB:
Tell that fellow on Mulberry Street that I will pay $135 a case
for Scotch and $90 for gin DELIVERED and not a cent more.
W. G. T.

{illustration caption =
The problem of an introduction when there is no mutual
acquaintance is sometimes perplexing. But the young man, having
had the good taste to purchase a copy of PERFECT BEHAVIOR, is
having no difficulty. He has fastened a rope across the sidewalk
in front of the lady's house and, with the aid of a match and
some kerosene, has set fire to the house. Driven by the heat, the
young lady will eventually emerge and in her haste will fall over
the rope. To a gentleman of gallantry and ingenuity the rest
should be comparatively simple.


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