Not very difficult, surely--but it is remarkable how much
enjoyment one can get out of music by the simple use of these two
formulas. With a little practise in their use, the veriest tyro
can bewilder her escort even though she be herself so musically
uninformed as to think that the celeste is only used in
connection with Aida, or that a minor triad is perhaps a young
wood nymph.
One other important fundamental is that enthusiasm should never
be expressed for any music written after 1870; by a careful
observance of this rule one will constantly experience that
delightful satisfaction which comes with finding one's opinions
shared by the music critics in the daily press.
{illustration caption =
The young lady in the picture has just laid out a perfect drive.
She had, unfortunately, neglected to wait until the gentleman
playing ahead of her had progressed more than fifteen yards down
the fairway, and her ball, traveling at a velocity of 1675 f.s.,
has caught the gentleman squarely in the half-pint bottle. What
mistake, if any, is the gentleman making in chasing her off the
course with his niblick, if we assume that she called "Fore!"
when the ball had attained to within three feet of the
gentleman?}
{illustration caption =
You will exclaim, no doubt, on looking at the scene depicted
above, "Cherchez la femme." It is, however, nothing so serious as
you will pardonably suppose.
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